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The BE DO HAVE Model Simplified

And how to use it with your clients

Page Summary

If you have not used the BE DO HAVE life coaching model, this simple explanation will help you understand how it works and show you some ways  to use it with your clients to help them achieve their outcomes and goals.

FYI: I may receive commissions at no cost to you. Please see my affiliate disclosure for more.

How The BE, DO HAVE Model Works?

The first thing to understand is that a goal or outcome has three aspects to be considered.

Asian group doing Tai Chi reflecting the idea of driving your goals with Be Do Have,
  • The HAVE - what is to be achieved 
  •  The DO - the actions that needs to be done to make it happen and
  • The BE,  or the WHO - who a person needs to authentically BE (how they need to behave) to DO and HAVE

Life Coaching is as much about working with the BE or WHO of a client as it is about supporting and holding them accountable for their actions, the "DO", so they can "HAVE" the outcome they want.

It's a model that is hugely useful when you are coaching clients with career or business issues, but can be just as relevant in highly emotional personal decision making processes. 

It need not be complicated! The BE can include things as basic as becoming someone who remembers to recharge a mobile phone, or having a time of day to make phone sales calls. It can be about not buying junk food or being firm about the type projects or requests that are acceptable. 

The problem is that that most people focus on the HAVE, the outcome instead of the BE which is the main driver for achieving the goal.

 So let's look at some examples:

Using Be Do Have In Goals Coaching

Nailing that  weight loss goal

A good example of this is the fitness or weight loss goals so many our clients struggle to achieve.

For someone to increase their chances of succeeding, they first need to  BEcome the person who is maybe willing to find better ways of handling stress instead of comfort eating and procrastinating about exercise. Or BE someone who is willing to give up things that might sabotage their weight loss (in my own case chocolate and cheese😀)

In other words to lose weight the client needs to, BE someone who can develop strategies to DO what it takes  -  maybe saying NO to that second piece of cake - and YES to more exercise! The result is the HAVE of the slim fit body!

Making more sales or signing up more clients

A small business client or an employee may have a goal to get 10 more clients or sales.

They may need to practice to BEcome someone who is not afraid to promote their service or product.

This might involve overcoming a reluctance for the DO which may mean such things attending networking functions, calling up contacts, or get busy on social media. 

Personal and relationship issues

A busy mother may need to change being overwhelmed by being at the beck and call of her family and friends and start looking after her own needs. This could be about BEcoming somebody who can say not to demands for their time. 

A small business owner is in overwhelm. She knows she need to do less but is afraid of letting go of any of her roles. You can coach them to BEcome someone who is willing to learn to delegate or outsource evenif it involves trial and error. 

In all these examples, you can see it is the BE or the WHO that can DO what it takes to reach the HAVE (the goal). And the BE often takes practice and encouragement as it may be a huge step out of a long held comfort zone.

The BE can be driven by the WHY of goal achievement. The reason for wanting to HAVE the goals must be strong enough to motivate the BE decision.

So who do you have to BE to DO what you need to do to HAVE a successful coaching practice. 
This is one of the important Personal Success Strategies to develop when planning a goal. I write more about it, as a Personal Success Policy, in my book Mastering the Art of Goals Coaching which you can preview using the links at the bottom of this page.

More Help to Achieve Coaching Mastery

If you now understand Be Do Have better, here are three books I can confidently recommend to grow your confidence and enhance your coaching experience beyond your coach training. Check out the reviews on Amazon.

The HeArt of Laser Focussed Coaching by Marion Franklin

The HeART of Laser Focussed Coaching by Marion Franklin

I have been an admirer of Marion Franklin (MCC) who been training and mentoring coaches for more than 20 years towards their ICF credentialing.

Her recently published book The HeArt of Laser Focused Coaching brings together so many of her insightful gems.

No matter where you are in your coaching journey, you will get value from her wisdom and her examples of great laser coaching - that is coaching that quickly gets to the heart of the issue.


Buy from Amazon; Influence- The new psychology of persuasion

Influence, The Psychology of Persuasion by Robert B. Cialdini  PhD 

This fascinating and easy to read book is about the human condition and what influences us and persuades us to do what we do. Things like "social proof" and "reciprocation".

The Psychology of Persuasion was such an eye opener for me and really helped me define why I and others act and react in certain ways to situations. Lots of stories and examples make it an enjoyable read, not to mention a valuable asset to your coaching.


Buy from Amazon: Coach the Person not the Problem by Marcia Reynolds

Coach the Person not the Problem by Marcia Reynolds

A pioneer of the coaching industry Marcia Reynolds is still considered one of the world’s leading coaches.

In her latest book, Coach the Person not the Problem she cites the latest brain science to show why reflective inquiry works and provides techniques, tips, and structures for creating breakthrough conversations.

It’s a gem for new and experienced coaches alike.


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Created and written by Wendy Buckingham, Class One Productions P/L. Sydney

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